As I re-read my last post (Overdone?), one sentence I wrote keeps haunting me:
“I don’t like not being liked.”
Well OMG – the lightning bolts are descending from heaven, jolting my everpresent coffee right out of my hands.
This sentence pretty much explains my whole life to date. (and that is getting to be quite a lengthy period, I must add.)
Oh, I know intellectually that out of the millions of people in this world, I will not like everyone I meet, and that of course there will be people who don’t like me.
But how I want them to!
I expend extraordinary amounts of effort trying to be liked.
I always let people go first – in every game when I was a kid, in line at the checkout, in my car at a stop sign.
At work, I’ve give others credit for work I did myself, I’ve gently “suggested improvements” by apologizing first for my presumption, I’ve stayed late after work correcting other people’s mistakes, and often even taken the blame for those mistakes.
At home – anywhere, really – I say “Sure” to whatever anyone wants to do. That movie? Sure. That restaurant? Sure. That brand of cookies? Sure.
And I seek validation for Everything. With a capital E. Do you like my salad? Do you like my writing? Do you like my paintings? Do you like my hair? Do you like my dog? My cat? How about this cat? How about this cat?
Oh, I know I am not the only one.
Most everyone I know is insecure.
Social Media has reinforced and exposed our insecurities at a stratospheric level. Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter – they all exist in large part for one reason: To ask –
Do You Like Me?
Once in a great while, I meet the rare person who does not care. They say,
– No, thank you. I don’t want to go there.
– Here’s what we should do.
– Facebook? Oh, I don’t do that.
I am always shocked.
How can you not ask first what everyone else wants?
How can you not want everyone to see what the snow looks like from your window?
How can you not be counting how many “likes” you have?
It’s almost as if some people like themselves quite sufficiently without needing everyone else to like them.
Well, that’s just nuts.
(please like this post)
Theo and me. Aren’t we cute? Don’t you like us? I can post another photo if you don’t like this one,