Category Archives: Humor
Becoming My Mother
Often, I read a joke or hear someone say, “Oh no, I’m becoming my mother!” And I think… “Oh God! Oh, How I wish I were!” Because my mother is everything I could ever hope to be. Except short. She’s short. Only the bottom shelves of her kitchen cabinets have ever been useful to her. …
Raindrops Keep Falling On Your Head
There’s an old joke my father used to tell. A guy goes to the doctor and lifts his left arm over his head and says, “It hurts when I do this.” The doctor replies: “Don’t do that.” I thought of this today as I was making coffee this morning. I cannot understand why someone hasn’t …
Thanks For The Movies
A Thankgiving rerun from a few years ago…. La-La-Land Just skimming through the New York Times, and I saw a review for the new movie, “La La Land.” From the review and the trailer – I really want to see it. Not that I see a lot of movies anymore. But, when I was a …
Abandon Ship!
In my first novel, JUST WHAT I ALWAYS WANTED, the main character, Cynthia, is considering making a momentous change in her life. She’s frightened of course, and she turns to her sister, Angela, for advice. Angela responds with a question: “Why do you think there were so many empty lifeboats on the Titanic?” she asked. …
Sweet Girls
Last year on this date, I wrote about a little girl who made me feel a little better about myself at a time I was hurt and vulnerable. (A Lesson In Shame) So today, I thought it would be appropriate to write about another childhood friend. When I was fifteen, my family moved across town. …
Losing My Temper
I don’t handle criticism well. I can pretend to shrug it off, but truthfully, it’s hard. It’s hard to have someone say you’re wrong. It’s harder for someone to say you’re dumb. And it is downright scary for someone to say vicious, even threatening, things about you. Two years ago, I tweeted often about my …
Savoring
This year has been stressful. It seems no one can agree. And everyone not agreeing seems to have permission to be nasty about it. I wouldn’t say fuses are short. More like tempers have no fuse at all – they are just bursting into loud and flaming assh explosions everywhere. Two images I saw this …
Advice From My Best Friend – Part 3
OMG – Theo’s daily Twitter advice continues to grow more popular! Two months ago, I said that Theo is more popular than I am. Well. He just took over my Twitter feed. As of yesterday, my Twitter is no longer called Not Quite Old. It is now officially Theo-sophy I am determined, …
How Old Is Mr. T?
Remember when you were a little kid and you’d meet some other kid in the playground or at school or in a store? One of the first questions you always asked was, “How old are you?” You were a little obsessed with age. You certainly didn’t want to play with a kid too much younger …
