Category Archives: Humor
The Patron Saint of Nonbelievers
I used to describe myself, as “Spiritual, but not religious.” That sounded so nice, but it really had no meaning. I wasn’t a worshipper of spirits or a believer in any other-worldly things. I guess that, loosely translated, it meant that I was a moral person, because I knew that I was happier good than …
One Size Fits All
It’s no secret – (because I have no secrets – I’ve written 256 posts over the last two years; there is no detail of my life not in print) – that I like big girl underpants. High in the waist and low on the legs – the kind that make me look like I am …
The Perils of a Long Marriage
A while ago, I started to recognize the symptoms that I have been married a long time. I am beginning to sound like my husband. Like when I said to the salesman at the kitchen shop, “I might be tempted to buy this skillet if you could give me a ten percent discount.” Uh-oh, I …
New York Report
Last week I went into The City (yup, that’s what we call in out here in East BumF**k) with a friend to see a Broadway play. We saw “Motown: The Musical”. I love Motown. I loved Motown even before I loved The Beatles. The music in this show was spectacular – although sometimes it …
I Get To Be A Princess
A couple of months ago, I reminisced about being eight years old and wanting to be Miss America. (When Nineteen Was Far Away.) I wanted to wear a gown and a tiara, and I thought that just maybe 2013 might be my year. And I was right! Last week my grand-niece (or is it great-niece? …
Secret Agent
I am a hoarder of confidential information. You may think I don’t have many secrets – after all, I have shared my colonoscopy with you. And you’ve read about my bad boyfriends, my bad haircuts, my bad habits, my bad career choices. And you’ve met every member of my family, past and present – who …
The Popular Table, Part 2
In the summer of 1969 – the summer between high school and college – there occurred an event so enormous it changed my life forever. I know what you are thinking – Apollo 11 – the moon landing! The triumph of science and exploration! Umm. No. Woodstock! I wasn’t there. In fact, I was so …
The Popular Table, Part 1
I had excellent friends in high school. They were smart and funny and generous. We went to basketball games, and talked about boys, and complained about parents. We sat at the same lunch table every day and laughed and cried over our tunafish sandwiches. But still, there was this tiny disloyal part of me that …
The Horrible, Though Imaginary, Family Secret
My maternal grandparents came to the US from Poland before World War I. They came separately – they didn’t meet until they were here for several years. As a matter of fact, my grandfather met and married someone else first, a young woman who died in the Great Influenza Pandemic of 1918. I don’t know …
I’ve Changed My Mind
About eight years ago, my husband and I moved to the country. Okay, not “country’ country. We’re one mile from the highway. But it’s a very second-rate highway. And there’s a sheep farm down the road. And watching those sheep, and driving around our little patch of rural Connecticut, I have been overcome with desire. …
notquiteold 