Nancy Roman

Just When You’re Ready To Strangle Them

A couple of nights ago, we were having dinner with some old friends. My husband has spent weeks under his classic car trying to get it ready for an upcoming show.  So Friend-Hubby volunteered to help.

“That would be friggin’ great!” said Hubby enthusiastically. (I thought for a moment he might cry.)

“I can come over any night this week. When do you want me?” asked Hubby-Friend.  (which is a synonym for Friend-Hubby – because I’m not sure which is the proper term)

“Let’s see,” said Hubby “…. tomorrow is Wednesday…”

(Which miraculously was correct…my husband never knows what day it is.  And let me digress further. One November, he asked me what day Thanksgiving was, and when I told him it was the 26th, he said, “No, I mean what day of the week” – and so I told him that this year Thanksgiving happened to fall on a Thursday, and he said – seriously – “Oh. Okay.”)

Let me start that sentence again:

“Let’s see…tomorrow is Wednesday,” (I’m repeating this for a reason) ” and I have to put the oil pan back on and switch out the tubes”  (okay, it wasn’t tubes, but I don’t know what the hell is was…), “and there’s the transistors”  (I didn’t take notes, all right?) “and the gaskets, and Thursday I’ll be ready for the duvet covers.  So maybe, Wednesday night.”

“Okay,” says Hubby-Friend, trying to follow (whereas I had completely given up).  So tomorrow night.”

And Hubby said. “I don’t know. What day is tomorrow?”



When we got home, I heard that distinctive chirp that drives me crazy but that my husband has never heard in his entire life.

“Uh-oh,” I said. “I think we need a new battery in the smoke detector in the den.”

“Where?” said Hubby.

“The den,” I repeated.

“I know you said ‘the den’ – but I’m not sure what room you mean.”

“It’s the room off the kitchen. The one with the TV and the bookcases and the leather furniture.” I admit this explanation may not have been in my inside voice.

“Oh.” said Hubby.

“What do YOU call that room?” I asked.

“The room with the TV” he answered.


You may not believe these conversations happened. But I SWEAR.  And the same evening, no less.


But here’s what he said the following day when I got home from work.

“Guess what I did today,” he said. “I went to the radio station. The door was locked and there was a sign that said ‘No Soliciting’ – but I banged on the door anyway. And  when someone finally opened the door, I explained that I had a story they should cover. I said that they needed to interview my wife. That my wife was an English major in college and she was a really good writer and even won some awards in school. But after college she got a job and the company helped pay for an MBA, and so she gave up writing and worked for her whole life in Finance. But a few years ago, she realized how much she missed writing and so she spent two years writing a novel while still working full-time. And now she’s published her book and it’s really good. She did it – and she’s a good example for anyone who thinks it’s too late or that their dreams are impossible. And so you need to tell her story.”

Did that make the radio station want to tell that story?

Well, No.

But it did make me want to stay married. At least for a few more days.


den or room with tv

The Room With The TV




  1. Men can be wonderful – at times – they’re such dears!! 🙂


    • At times.


      • gostei da tua estoria sao coisas que acontece com a gente a familia e amigos beijos querida mas cuida bem de teu marido nao deixa dele nao


  2. Been there, heard that. It is my fervent hope that I never see another old car within a half mile of my house or checkbook.


  3. Yes you need to keep him. And after you kill him, you can have him stuffed and stand him in the den next to the lovely fireplace.


  4. Sweet! Lovely den/room with the tv!


    • Thanks. We have now been living in that house (which he built by the way) for ten years. I have called it the Den for ten years. Shows you how much he listens to me.


  5. I think most men are bi polar. My husband doesn’t take much interest in my writing, which I forgive him for. He doesn’t get why anyone would sit and write blogs and tweet and stuff like that all the time. Yet he is the first to relate sports tweets and always has a book close by. And I so hear you on the gobblygook about what day of the week it is or the tools thing. Just think of it as his “calling”. A few crossed wires, maybe…heh…


    • My husband actually doesn’t take much interest in my writing. He’s not into books – just cars. But he is certainly and obviously proud that I do it.


  6. Oh he is so sweet!


  7. The title says it all 🙂


    • Yeah. He seems to have an uncanny instinct to know when I am at the end of my tolerance – and then he redeems himself.


  8. that is adorable. what a great guy he is 🙂


    • I keep reminding myself of that…. so I don’ strangle him.


  9. 😀 😀 😀 Your hubby is delightful. Yep. He’s a keeper.


    • Yeah, I figure I will keep him. He exasperates me. But he’s not too much trouble either. Sort of like a semi-housebroken dog.


  10. Laurie

    Ha ha to the above comment and to the story as a whole. What a heartwarming ending. And you have a beautiful den


  11. My husband is also a ‘car enthusiast’ and has no clue about the rooms in our house (we’ve lived here 14 years). If I say ‘the guest bedroom’ he says ‘the room with the other bed?’ there’s only ONE bedroom [other than the master] with a bed in it); if I mention ‘the family room’, he says ‘you mean downstairs?’; if I need something from ‘the laundry room’, he says, ‘you mean the furnace room’? I think it comes from sniffing all those strange fumes in the garage! I do love the way your husband ‘supported’ you and your writing, though; mine is super supportive, too (even though he doesn’t read anything I write). I often think they know just when to prove themselves so we don’t murder them in their sleep.


    • Oh yeah, and their timing is impeccable, because there would be no benefit in pleasing me if I’m happy with him anyway.


  12. Kim

    I used to live in a house with just one public room we called the living room. Now we live in a house with a living room and a family room (or den, whatever you want to call it.) The other three members of my family can’t grasp this concept. They keep calling the family room the living room. If I say something about the living room they want to know which room I am referring to. My husband grew up in a house with a living room and a family room, so at least he should get it…but he doesn’t. Sigh…..Drives me nuts!


    • I sometimes say “family room” – that must be why he was confused…


  13. Lovely room!
    We’ve already named our bow ‘The Conservatory’ now it’s got a cover on it!


    • Maybe I should start calling it the Conservatory and really blow his mind.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Keeping him seems to be the best course of action. He is a good one.


  15. Ray G

    Now, I know both of you. I have no favorite. I love both of you. But, you two are different. As it should be. If you DO strangle hubby, give me his guns, please (his other outside interest, not just cars). If you don’t resort to violence, just think about all the stuff he does that you would prefer not to do.
    And to remember that his attention-getting at the radio station had NOTHING to do with any stimulants, which he isn’t “into”. Just his regard for you.


    • It was sweet and I do appreciate him. He does tons of stuff I hate to do.


  16. Definitely stay married!! These conversations are priceless and I want to keep reading more…


    • If nothing else, he is a great source of material.


  17. Karron

    TV Room? Seriously? I thought it was just my husband who was/is/will always be lost in his own little cloud and totally unaware of things like dates, days of the week, birthdays, holidays. But, he always remembers our anniversary – all three of them – long story.


  18. At least yours has old cars. Mine has old car radios–hundreds of them. Most are incomplete, but he keeps them all “in case someone needs one someday” or “in case I need a part to fix one for someone.” Not, you notice, to fix one for us, because we don’t have any old cars. And I love him anyway.


    • No doubt about it: We are saints – the both of us.


  19. I love this story. Your husband is a doll. And you have the same story as me, another accountant who decided it’s never too late to do what you’ve always wanted to do. So I too wrote a book and another and another. It’s a great story and I too don’t understand why radio stations and local papers don’t want to cover these stories because I’ve tried too. We need more stories like yours and mine. But in the meantime, we’ll make do with sweet husbands.


  20. eu li toas as istorias de voces e gostei muito me diverti gosto muito de ler e paso lendo na internete ou livros pois de marido eu ha muito tempo nao tenho oque falar sou viuva ha 23 ano entao nao tenho marido nada me emcomoda mais vivo no meu mundinho qe eu fiz pramim tranquilo calmo e sou feliz grasas a deusnos domingos vou a igreja converso com meus patores e irmaos com a minha filha qe mora comigo e tracuilo moro no meu sitio ar puro muito bom beijos a todas voces ate outra hora



  1. The Sounds Of Silence | notquiteold

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