notquiteold

Nancy Roman

Drive-Thru Confessions

Guilt Relief In Thirty Seconds:

1.

We have cats.  Cats puke.  Sometimes when I walk into a room and see that one of our cats has thrown up, I turn around and give my husband time to find it instead.

2.

My toaster oven does not cook very evenly.  When I make toast, one slice is nicely toasted, but not the other.  I usually give my husband the other.

3.

When I buy something new, I don’t wear it right away.  I put it in a drawer for a couple of weeks.  When I finally do wear it, if my husband asks, “Is that new?”  – I say “No, I’ve had this for a while.”

4.

I like to write (in my head) during a long drive. When I get a good idea, and I need some alone-time to think it out, I watch for a new BMW, or Ford, or …well, any car, really, and I say to my husband, “What do you think about that model?”  And while he goes on about cars, I have at least a good half-hour with my thoughts.

All done, thank you.  I feel better.

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Image by garyowen via Flickr

 

21 Comments

  1. bigsheepcommunications

    Um, does your husband read your blog? I’m going to guess not…

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    • You’re right….he doesn’t read it. But he really is the sweetest guy in the world, and he puts up with me.

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  2. I love the one about the toast. Broken yolks and burnt toast always go to the husband. I tell him,”Good thing you are not picky like me.”

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  3. They say confession is good for the soul…but maybe not the marriage….:-)

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  4. I always set up the coffee to start brewing before my wife gets up, which is always before me. She wanted to get a Keurig coffee maker, and I told her we really couldn’t afford it because a cup of that costs probably 5 times what a cup of brewed Folgers costs. I found an inexpensive Keurig, and gave it to her because I realiuzed that would give me the whole pot of coffee to myself, brewed fresh.

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  5. Ahh….most married women have tricks such as yours…and probably lots more too that will NEVER be shared! Great post; glad your confession eased your conscience. LOL

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    • Let me add again how sweet he is…which is why I feel so guilty about my self-absorption. Doesn’t mean I will necessarily change, of course, just that I feel bad about it.

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  6. Oh how do you do it? Day after day hitting the nail right on the head about the little truths of life! BTW, my sweet husband actually says he LIKES the burnt toast, thank heavens… and the darling just brought me this day’s first cup of coffee. Ah love is wonderful the 2nd time around! Fun treating each other like royalty.

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  7. I admit to having similar experiences but must start each confession with ‘I don’t have a husband but…’

    1. I walk away anyway, in disgust, until I’m ready to clean up (Yuck)
    2. I only toasted one piece yet one side came out brown and the other not, so I got rid of it
    3. I put away purchases so I can treat myself when a special occasion arises…
    4. I don’t trust myself to drive and think, so I veg on my couch until my thinking works itself out then I scribble like mad

    I bet this one gets a lot of responses. Thanks for the laugh.

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    • Nice to know that you don’t need a husband to feel guilty…

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  8. PS…. I apologize to all this morning’s readers for a stupid typo. I hate typos. All fixed now, but I feel guilty. I’m good at guilty.

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  9. Every time I come here I leave with valuable life advice. Please blog everyday. No pressure.

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    • Uhh… no pressure; right. I’ve only been blogging a short time… I do wonder sometimes if I will run out of ideas. But thanks!

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  10. I’ve been reading you for a little while, but this one needs a comment! I do the same thing about the cats-except we have a little dog. Of course, I tell myself that the reason he puked is because husband fed him something other than dog food, so it’s his responsibility. Right? I think husband is on to me, but so far, no complaint from him. I think he does things like this to me, too. It all evens out in the end. That’s what marriage is all about.

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    • I’m sure my husband does the same thing where the cats are concerned… we definitely trade our evasions.

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  11. Ha HA!

    For many of the 18+ years that our 2 cats were with us, cat puke was completely invisible to me. My poor spouse…..

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  12. Ha! I love it – made me laugh.

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  13. Too funny! I love all of them especially the cake puke one and the new clothes! All these years I could’ve been implementing them…dang!

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  14. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one with a crappy toaster. My toaster just decides to sometimes not toast the bread at all even when cranked to full throttle. Great post!

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  15. I thought I was the only one turning a blind eye to cat puke, sometimes having to avoid an entire room for more than one day in a row, and then appearing self-righteously outraged and appalled when someone else finds it. I then spread some random guilt out there with old standards like “That’s why we can’t have anything nice.”

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  16. Bravo! I have only read 3 of your posts, but I loved them.
    I recently turned 48 and feel the aging coming on, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly and with more of a jolt.
    I need women like you for inspiration and yucks. You are a good writer and your blog is very tidy, which I love. Not cluttered.
    Thanks for your good writing and humor. I will visit again. twinkly

    Like

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