notquiteold

Nancy Roman

They’re Practically Twins!

Considering how much I adored my father, it was astonishing to me that I fell in love with and married a man who was so different from my dad.

Take Sports, for example. My father was a true sports fan. Football, basketball, baseball, golf. Though I am a horrible athlete, I know a lot about sports, because I loved sitting with Dad on Sunday afternoon. The only sport he didn’t have much affection for was auto racing. So guess what is the only sport my husband likes? And not only auto racing, but specifically drag racing. He and his brother actually campaigned a dragster quite successfully for a long time. “The cars that race for five seconds and a parachute comes out?” my father asked. Yeah.

And speaking of cars, Dad had a sharp technical mind and engineering background. But he was just fine to let ALL the car repair get done by someone else. He had absolutely no inclination to open a hood. Hubby, on the other hand, can take apart and build a car from scratch. He actually built a dump truck early in our marriage. Mostly out of scrap. And it ran for years, and then he sold it – for a profit.

My father and my husband have completely different temperaments too. My father was always such a light-hearted guy – he woke up smiling and stayed that way. He sang – not well. He told corny jokes – also not well. My husband is serious. A born worrier. An earnest soul who takes everything to heart.

And they are a world apart in their willingness to express their opinions – especially concerning their fellow man. My father never said a bad word about anyone. I remember a boyfriend I had way back when who was a complete arrogant jerk. I was playing cribbage with my father one night and Dad said very softly to me, “I’m sorry, but I just don’t like that guy very much.” If my husband had met that same person, he would have been a bit more forceful. My husband has the most extensive vocabulary you have ever heard – he knows more synonyms for ‘moron’ that I ever knew existed. With a colorful range of adjectives to precede the noun.

Yes, I married the complete opposite of my father.

EXCEPT.

Just last week, we were in the car and my husband sneezed. And he took out his handkerchief and blew his nose. While steering the car WITH HIS KNEES!

Oh My God!

My father did that all the time!  I remember knee-steering happening from the time I was sitting in my little very unsafe car seat.

Do all men blow their noses while steering with their knees? Or has my father reappeared?

And the very next day…

My husband farted. And walked away as he said with complete nonchalance, “Oops.”

Case closed.

Reincarnation.

youngdad

34 Comments

  1. “Oops”? That’s it? Not “HAAAHHHH – good one!”??? Honey, you have NO reason to complain!

    Liked by 1 person

    • “oops” is all my Dad would say…. nothing more, just always “oops”

      Liked by 1 person

  2. sassycoupleok

    Oops !! Like the toilet paper, it’s just another guy thing. At least it appears he doesn’t blast you with the silent but deadly variety !! That’s a real OOPS !! Laughing…………

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    • Is there a medical reason why men are so farty?

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      • sassycoupleok

        Medical reason, probably so but probably more from bad eating habits. The scary thing is aging, (a subject dear to you) you gradually loose some control over when they happen, they just sometimes come out. My mother in-law is a loose cannon, she looses control all the time. In her case it’s just good laughter material. 🙂

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  3. At least he didn’t waft it in your direction, look at you and say “you’re welcome.”

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    • I thought I had it bad. Then I read these comments. My father and husband are quite polite.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. At least you got an ‘oops’. Hubby says ‘Who did that???’ and look at ME!

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  5. You were right the first time: they ARE practically twins. 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀

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  6. I meant THEY. Oops! 😦

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  7. At least your husband didn’t ask “What’d that asshole say?” Sigh.

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  8. And you were expecting anything about men to make sense? You did make me reflect though. My current husband and my Dad are/were pretty similar except that my Dad farted in the sofa cushions (eyew!) and my husband does silent ones wherever. I think he is of an age where he can’t quite predict when they will launch.

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  9. Dana

    My dad used to steer the station wagon with his knees!

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    • Yes, I am beginning to see that it is universal. Man-style universal.

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  10. My dad was also a firm believer in the steering power of knees. He also wasn’t too terribly concerned with looking at the road if we were passing by anything remotely more interesting than what was straight ahead.

    He also managed to drive me all the way to school one day with his coffee mug forgotten on top of the car. Miraculously, the mug survived the journey. The travel lid that had been covering it did not.

    Then of course when I first got my learner’s permit he acted like his life was flashing before his eyes every time I got behind the wheel, which I thought was a bit hypocritical since I spent my entire childhood pressing my foot furiously down on an imaginary brake.

    My husband is an occasional knee-driver too. I think it’s just a guy thing. He doesn’t drink coffee, though, so I’ll never be able to put him to the mug test.

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    • My husband seems to have a much higher standard when I drive than when he drives.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Too funny! No, I never heard of the steering with the knees thing. I do think my daughter married her grandfather, though. Skipped a generation.

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    • Oh dear. I see it. I see that my husband is a lot more like my grandfather than my father! That is NOT good news!

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  12. Knee steering is the bane of our travels as a couple. It makes me crazy, yet I secretly marvel at the skill. I could never do it and I have longer legs!

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    • Maybe it’s a good Kegel exercise -and that’s why men don’t have to pee as often as women?

      Liked by 1 person

      • sassycoupleok

        LOL !!!! Not men over 60 !!

        Like

  13. Christine

    I also remember that if there were no other cars around, Dad liked to drive down the middle of the road, straddling the center line. Does Tom do that too? (I expect there aren’t as many opportunities for straddling, since traffic now is pretty heavy everywhere and all the time!)

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    • Tom drives in the middle of the road EVEN WHEN there are other cars around.

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  14. Sounds like they’re twins in all the important stuff. All the rest is just window dressing.

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  15. How funny. You were lucky to have both men in your life. Although different in many ways, they have one huge thing in common — they both loved you.

    Like

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