notquiteold

Nancy Roman

Those Less Fortunate

I’ve always tried to be considerate of those who are less fortunate than myself.

People are born with different levels of ability, and then there are environmental advantages or disadvantages that affect how well we all understand and perform. And so ordinary activities of daily living can be a challenge for those not as blessed.

And sometimes I forget that, so I have decided to try harder to be more compassionate.

For example, as children, lots of us had a hard time differentiating between right and left. I remember the nuns were very keen that we made the sign of the cross with our right hands, and I used to have to surreptitiously pretend to write in the air, in order to confirm which one exactly was my right hand. This pencil-test was valuable for the Pledge of Allegiance as well. But I’ve realized that some poor souls still have left-right confusion. This results in the inability to recall what side of the car the damn gas tank is on.

wrong side

 

And speaking of cars, many people have a lot of important shit on their minds when they drive. They need to concentrate so hard, they may become unaware of visual and audio cues. And that’s why it may take ten miles or so of highway for these overly-burdened folk to switch off their turn signals after changing lanes, despite the click-click-clicking noise or the flashing light on their dashboards.

turn signal

We make cruel jokes about uncoordinated people being unable to walk and chew gum at the same time. But this is obviously a serious issue for some. We see the sorrowful evidence all the time. And yet there is no fundraising event for these afflicted humans to help them close their mouths when they walk.

gum

Disorientation is a rampant tragedy. I believe someone should invent in-store GPS for the directionally-challenged shopper, who cannot seem to remember in what aisle they found the product that they have since decided they do not really want to buy.

steak on shelf

Public bathrooms are a terrible source of confusion for many. It was a sad realization for me that so many women in my own office cannot flush a toilet. Some major part of their education was dismally neglected in their young formative years. I won’t add a photo here…(you’re welcome)… but I will illustrate the enormous bewilderment experienced by many as to what exactly to do with ladies’ room trash.

ladies room trash

And finally, I grieve for the persons unable to comprehend spatial relationships. Especially when travelling, these folks are so overwhelmed by the mysterious phenomenon known as Flight that they become totally unaware of trivial things like the size of baggage. In particular, they are no longer aware that their bags are physically larger in length, width, and depth than the compartment intended to hold those bags.

Pray for these people, for as they walk down the narrow airplane aisle they tragically lose all conscious knowledge of the appendages of their body. including – as horrifyingly improbably as it may seem –  their forty-pound backpack .

backpackattack

26 Comments

  1. Brilliant post! 🙂

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  2. I once lent my car to my aunt and she asked simple questions about the controls, but was amazed when I showed her the little icon of a gas pump explaining that it was on the right side of the fuel gauge because that was where the filler cap was located.

    I love the title, might need to use it at the office someday.

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    • That would be cool if every car was designed that way… but I guess not.

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  3. Is that a package of bacon? I get so annoyed when I see stuff like that. And is THAT why the gum on the ground? It falls out? I just figured it was inconsiderate lazy assholes spitting their gum out for my shoe to (always!) find.

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    • I looks like a steak to me. And it must be that gum just falls out of the mouths of poor uncoordinated people. I mean, who would be so nasty as to just spit out their gum anywhere?

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  4. I have been at the receiving end of so many pokes from back packs of fellow travelers :/ Entertaining read!

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    • I have been clobbered by even an extra large purse. Backpacks are deadly.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. The inability to flush a toilet at the office is a pet peeve of mine. How does one forget to do that?

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    • I wonder if it is a longstanding fear to touch the flush handle? Of course, that’s what sinks and soap are for, but perhaps they are afraid to touch them too?

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  6. Ick. I don’t understand how someone can forget to flush. What do they do at home?

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  7. June

    Unfortunately, it seems that these challenged idiots are EVERYWHERE!!!

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  8. Laurie

    A delight to read. Of course these people are challenged. And down here in the south we have men who never learned to swallow their saliva or else find somewhere discreet to dispose of it. I am not a spitoon, thank you

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  9. Each and every one of those less fortunate mentioned have crossed my path on a regular basis. My daily mall walks bring to mind another less fortunate group. The people that do not understand that keeping to the right will make passing oncoming pedestrians less awkward and certainly prevent any collisions.

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  10. To flush or not to flush, that is the question. “if it’s yellow, let it mellow. If it’s brown, flush it down”. Great advice if there’s a water shortage and you are in your own home, but ‘going’ after somebody else, especially someone you work with? E-ew!
    As for remembering which side of the car the filler cap is, hm. That is if you can find the filler cap in the first place (had a real game when I bought my Datsun).
    Great post. 🙂

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    • The last time I screwed up the side with the gas tank was when I filled my mother’s car for her. Drove up to the wrong side, and when I turned around… DUH… for some reason I was still on the wrong side!

      Liked by 1 person

  11. In the ladies room, sometimes I think women are making themselves “Queen for a day” (or for the stay); i.e., “let the servants clean up, that’s their job.” When I see a big pile of towels like that I get a fresh one (cuz I don’t want to touch it) and gather ’em all up and throw them away.

    The meat on the shelf is perfect.

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    • I can see a lazy person putting canned food down just anywhere. But a steak???? How lazy do you have to be?

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I love this. The bathroom at work part especially. I have never been the sharpest tool in the shed when it comes to directions and being directional, and as I get older I tend to get confused, too. I have learned that all I can do is laugh about it and make those around me laugh about it too. P.S. I still don’t get the clogging-the-toilet-at-work thing, though…that’s not being forgetful..that’s being a slob.

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    • I believe the non-flusher must be on the same “nature schedule’ as I am. Because it ALWAYS seems to be waiting for me.

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  13. These are all important failures ofhumankind. But I’d like to address the first one. And for folks like me who are trying to figure out which one that is, I will tell you — folks who have trouble telling right from left.

    In high school, I once complained of the fact that I had trouble with distinguishing R from Last without thinking of the Pledge of Allegiance and how I placed my right hand over my heart. The smartest person I knew, my friend Jane, told me not to worry. She had read a study that said that intelligent women suffered from this problem. Side Jne admitted that she has the same problem AND Jane had just been admitted to Yale, I decided she was right. It maybe left. One of the two.

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