notquiteold

Nancy Roman

Dad, The Annoying

Every year at this time, I remember my Dad’s birthday with a small tribute.

I’ve discussed some of the things I loved about him (‘The Smartest Person’), and some of the things that he loved (“Of Tom Mix and Clam Chowder”).

But my Dad was just a guy after all, and he could be just as annoying as any guy.

Like his housework mentality.

My mother worked for many years as a nurse at the city hospital. This meant working every other weekend, and on those weekends she was scheduled at the hospital, my father was in charge at home.

And when I was a teenager, he developed a special method for weekend housework. The method was this: he got up at dawn and did it all.

As I said, I was a teenager. Teenagers need a lot of sleep. Right?  A lot more than grownups. Right? I wasn’t lazy; I was tired. Right?

And it wasn’t my fault that Dad did all the housework before I ever got out of bed. Right?

Right.

Exactly right.

Because Dad’s motives were not exactly pure.

He loved – and I mean LOVED – to greet my mother when she arrived home with the following announcement:

“I did all the housework and the kids didn’t even help!”

Yeah. All you women are nodding your heads right now.

My Dad was a guy after all.

My mother once told me (in private) after he tattled on our Saturday sloth , “Don’t worry about it. Your father likes being a martyr. He’s a man.”

Every day I miss my father’s sweet and generous nature.

Some days

–    like today    –

I miss his annoying self too.

 

satmorning

 

 

 

21 Comments

  1. This resonates. Our parents, and others that were close to us, annoying and loving parts alike, are deeply missed when they are no longer with us. I miss my dad too.

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    • I’d like to say that I would no longer find his annoying traits so annoying – except that I probably still would. But I’d treasure them too.

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  2. Ah, yes…..man, the martyr…..

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  3. I love to think that one day my kids will miss both my good and my not-so-good qualities!

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  4. My dad used to do the same thing — start chores at the crack of dawn. Hell had no fury like my dad if you didn’t help! And I miss it too. But he was still a stinker …

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    • I think my dad would have been disappointed if we had helped. He liked the martyr role. But I miss him, however annoying his housekeeping was.

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  5. What a wonderful man, but still a man. 😀 😀

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  6. I can’t remember my Dad doing housework when we were kids, but now in his seventies he’s quite attached to the vacuum!

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  7. Ray G

    I have said a few times that Bill A. was the nicest guy I ever knew. Looking back, I think he ties with your dad.

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    • They were certainly two of a kind. Easy to laugh and never a bad word about anyone.

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  8. Christine

    I miss Dad’s annoying habits too. My two favorites (?): He used to answer the phone with “Joe’s Bar and Grill”, which caused my friends to say “sorry, wrong number” and hang up, at least until they caught on. And when I was engrossed in reading something, he would come up to me and rub his two thumbs all over the lenses of my glasses, so I would have to stop and clean them. But with these tricks, he taught us that is was Ok not to be serious all the time and to have fun whenever you could.

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    • I remember him smearing your glasses – that was very annoying – and I miss it. (especially because it was you, not me.)

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  9. my Dad drove me crazy. I am exactly like him, our looks, our attitudes (sarcasm, temper, quick wit, wry sense of humor). He raised three girls after my mother died (ages 14, 11, and 8). I can’t even remember the year he died, it was sudden and a great shock to me. There are times when something happens and I think, I need to call Dad and tell him this. This is after 20+ years since his death. He left a legacy he never knew. But, as my mom used to say (and I remember this 48 years after she has passed) All men are alike, they just have different faces so you can tell yours apart from the others.. Great post. Thank you for sharing this.

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  10. Wish my husband did the same thing – I wouldn’t even mind if he bragged about it, as long as he did all the work.

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  11. Sweet. Truly, it wasn’t until my Dad was single and then later when he remarried he even knew what housework was. Well, that isn’t quite true, if you were in the house you worked that was his motto. Your dad sounds like a gem.

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