Is There A Pattern Here?
I love patterns.
I don’t mean patterns as in stripes and polka dots. Although come to think of it, there’s nothing that can cheer me up like a pretty floral cardigan.
No, in this case I mean patterns as in pleasing structured compositions.
I feel great when kids walk in pairs. Even better when they are in school uniforms. Holding hands.
My favorite parking space is between two cars the same silver color as mine. But still better if I can park next to the same model car. Separated at birth, they can catch up while I shop.
I like an interesting balance. If I wear a nice big watch on my left wrist, I like three bracelets on my right wrist. And I certainly want to sit next to the person whose clothes complement my color scheme. No clashing for me.
I enjoy finding patterns in what I see. Numbers in order. (which is fortunately helpful in Accounting, which is unsurprisingly how I make a living.)
Words within words. Names that go together. When Grace talks to Kelly it makes my whole day. My husband has friends named Roy and Dale. I could listen to him talk about his friends for hours (when usually I hardly listen to him at all).
I also like a deal. Give me a sale, a gift with purchase, a tag sale find.
So I hit the jackpot this week.
LivingSocial has sent me some great offers that display that satisfying cohesion. (They were even in these neat Mondrian rectangles. How soothing is that!)
First: I can get two treatments for toe fungus. I’m not sure whether that is two treatments on both my feet, one treatment on each foot, or whether I have to choose two toes. I don’t want to play favorites or anything, but my big toes are campaigning hard.
Next: A Paintball Getaway. Six friends; all day. I would rather not shoot paint at my friends. Can I invite some enemies? Maybe my old boss? Can I ensure that I am the only one armed? Can I shoot instead at cars that pass me on the right? What about the little asshole who answers her phone in the middle of Zumba class?
Then: There’s a fabulous offer for a two-day colonic cleanse. I am sure this refreshing and enjoyable. I am sure it is very different from the colonoscopy I had in April. For one thing, the cleanse process includes a chocolate mousse.
And: I can buy some horseback riding lessons. The program is called “Train To Trot.” This meshes nicely with the cleanse. I went horseback riding once on a business retreat in Arizona. My horse was what they call ‘spirited’. My ass was not.
Oh, LivingSocial has created a pleasing symmetry in its offers.
And to unite these offers into one amazing, perfect pattern of a package, I also get $20 to buy a Wall Word. This is a wonderful graphic to express my deepest emotions.
And I know just what word to buy: