In My Not Quite Humble Opinion
I have a few opinions.
I often say to my husband, “I don’t know why you would ever argue with me, when you know that I am always right.”
With everyone I am not married to, however, I am actually quite tolerant. I know that I’m right, but I realize that other people mistakenly think they are right too. I am a very nice person, so I let them think so. (And I know I would never convince them anyway – I haven’t even convinced my husband.)
But the other day I heard something on the radio that reminded me of just how right I am.
It was an ad for the local airport.
It is my opinion that it is a complete waste of money for airports to advertise. Hearing an ad for an airport does not make me want to go there. I go there when I need to fly someplace. And then I go to the nearest airport that gets me there. In Connecticut we only have one airport. Guess where I fly from? And hearing that ad a few days ago didn’t make me say, “I have to find someplace to go, so that I go to that awesome airport.”
Ditto for hospitals. I will admit that a hospital may want the public to know about what services it offers. But lately, one of our local hospitals has been advertising an app that you can download which keeps track of the waiting time in the ER. If you need to go to the ER, in my opinion, you should just GO. Checking the wait time may be more appropriate for Space Mountain.
Speaking of being in pain, it is also my opinion that tearjerker movies are very therapeutic. Having a good cry about something that doesn’t hurt you personally is a great stress-reliever. I learned this forty-five years ago when I saw “Midnight Cowboy” for the second time. I had seen it with friends, and then gone again with my sister a few weeks later. Knowing how it ended, I started crying about half-way into the movie. Every time Ratzo said “Florida” I cried a little more. By three-quarters of the way through, I was bawling. Loudly. And after the movie was over, I felt wonderful. Euphoric even.
Several times a year, you should pick a movie that really gets the waterworks flowing: “Terms of Endearment,” or “Kramer Vs Kramer” – even “Old Yeller” if that does it for you. Have a fabulous cry. Sob even.
Which leads me to tissue. In this case, bathroom tissue. Toilet Paper. It always should be positioned to roll from the top over the front. Not down the back. Not ever.
You may disagree with me. You’d be wrong. But I’m way too nice to say so.
Correct.
(Next time: Style Opinions)
- Posted in: Aging ♦ Humor
- Tagged: Advertising, Tearjerkers, toilet paper
notquiteold 
I’m with you about the correct way to “install” toilet paper. But I don’t do sad movies….
LikeLike
Of course I am right about the TP. And you need to give a sad movie a try. You’ll feel the weight lifted after, I promise.
LikeLike
They just seem to depress me. I think I did enough crying through my earlier years to last me for awhile! 🙂
LikeLike
It’s a damn good thing (for all four of us) that you didn’t marry MY husband since he is always right too. It would be so very confusing.
LikeLike
A marriage made in hell, for sure!
LikeLike
I agree with you, of course. I would simply add Beaches to the list if films. And maybe Brief Encounter. ..
LikeLike
Those are good ones!
LikeLike
Yup, you are SO right. That toilet paper needs to roll over the top. LOL
LikeLike
Of course I’m right!
LikeLike
Yes, I agree. Beaches was a good one. I had a lump in my throat all the way through, not being able to cry. And, you are right about the toilet paper. That’s my only way to set it on the dispenser. Several years ago, my husband and I were visiting his son who, at the time, was living in the panhandle of Florida. My husband and I used the guest bathroom of course, and his son and his wife used theirs. On occasion, this son arose early and didn’t want to disturb his wife and used the guest bathroom. When I went in there later, I found the roll of paper turned around so that it came from behind. So, preferring it the “right” way, I turned it around. The next time I went into the bathroom some time later, I found it turned the wrong way again, so I turned it round to the right way. This went on for a couple of days. Finally, we confronted each other about it and had a wonderful, refreshing laugh! After that, he didn’t turn it around to the “wrong” way. Ha!
LikeLike
I’ve had that happen to! – someone change the TP in my own house! When I use the bathroom in someone else’s house, I would never think to “fix” their wrong-way TP. (although I want to.)
LikeLike
In a recent study 9 out of 10 husbands agreed that their wives are always right. The 10th husband hasn’t been seen since. 🙂
LikeLike
Yes, life is so much easier if they will just OBEY.
LikeLike
Old Yeller gets me e.v.e.r.y. time. All I have to do is think of the movie and I;m a goner.
I have no opinion on the toilet paper. So long as it’s available, I’m not fussy.
LikeLike
Availability is the first priority. Next is correct hang method. (I was going to write ‘number 1’ and ‘number 2’ but it just seemed inappropriate.
LikeLike
🙂
LikeLike
Absolutely correct about the TP! When I worked in an office full of women, they always hung the TP wrong, and after about a year there were deep gouges in the drywall just from forty women’s long fingernails dragging across the wall umpteen times a day. But nobody ever hung the TP “right”…
LikeLike
I think it is more sanitary, since you will take the piece you touch. But even more important, it is more aesthetically pleasing.
LikeLike
Until a friend ‘corrected me’, I hadn’t thought about the TP issue. Now I find it annoying if it’s the wrong way round and put it right!
As for films, I watched Meet Joe Black on my own yesterday when Hubby walked the dog and bawled my eyes out (again).
Movie for Valentine night was much more refreshing : Vin Diesel in Riddick. I sobbed (they killed his dog, but he got his own back, YES!)
LikeLike
Any movie that lets you cry a bit works – even a Vin Diesel movie (although that’s a bit difficult for me to imagine.)
LikeLike
It was the dog bit that got me going!
LikeLike
Anyone who has a young cat will agree about the toilet paper rolling from the top. I learned that lesson years ago, when I had it rolling down the back. After coming home one afternoon and finding the toilet paper decorating the entire house. My cat had discovered that it rolled off very easily from the back if she just hooked a claw into it….Over the top is definitely the right way!
LikeLike
I think that cats are capable of TP’ing the house no matter how you hang the roll. But yeah, it was probably easier from the back.
LikeLike
A box of tissue is always needed for The Joy Luck Club and Marley and Me. I left the movie theatre after Marley and EVERYONE had tears streaming down their cheeks. Even grown men – and no apologies – it was actually funny and folks were crying so much they began laughing about it. On another note – if you want a really “feel good” movie just watch “Happy-Go-Lucky” with Sally Hawkins and you’ll feel good afterwards. No argument on the TP – I find it hard to resist turning it around and slightly annoyed when I find it has been hung WRONG.
LikeLike
Good choices!
LikeLike
I prefer books for a cry…. and my children had to suffer a lot from their always right and know-it-all mother…. but not even for them I am able to change (and thus diminish myself and having to cry all the time ……no!)
LikeLike
2 books that made me shed a tear: Sandra Brown’s Breath of Scandal and Cathy Kelly’s Lessons in Heartbreak.
LikeLike
I read a sad book on a plane once. I was sobbing. I think it made my fellow passengers a tad uncomfortable. But I felt great.
LikeLike
I’l have to give those a try.
LikeLike
It took a while until my husband finally realized that I am always right (no, really, I am). Now he usually looks to me for the proper answer unless it’s a construction job and then I am usually right too. It ain’t easy being us.
LikeLike
Do you remember the movie, “Broadcast News”? At one point, Holly Hunter’s boss says to her (sarcastically): “It must be nice to always believe you know better, to always think you’re the smartest person in the room.” And she answers (earnestly), “No, it’s awful.” — I love that scene.
LikeLike
You’re right! About ads for airports and hospitals. Funny commentary, too (hope you’ll think I’m right about that.)
LikeLike
Yes, you are right, because I completely agree.
LikeLike
you are correct.. and also, when it is empty, you replace it… somehow the latter escapes the comprehension of hubby… great post.
LikeLike
I used to work in a small company – no more than 10 of us and only 2 or 3 women. Went into the ladies room and there was ONE SQUARE left on the roll. Now come ON!
LikeLike
My hubby is pretty good at that, but he is known to steal a roll from another bathroom rather than make the trip to the pantry.
LikeLike
I agree with everything you’ve said. Which is a good thing, but I am always right! 🙂
LikeLike
Don’t you find it amazing that more people don’t listen to us?
LikeLike
Agree totally!!
LikeLike
Of course!
LikeLike
You are so right! Right about being right! Right about airports and hospitals and ads. And you are right on funny. And I loved Write’s comment – funny and write
LikeLike
I really would not be able to stand it if my husband was ever right. Good thing he never is.
LikeLike
What can I say? When you are right, you are right.
LikeLike
And I always am.
LikeLike
I have to agree – you are right……it has taken 25 years to train my husband, but my 19 year old son refuses to play the game right. …..that’s when he does change the toilet roll. But that is another argument!
LikeLike
Eventually your son’s wife will finish the training.
LikeLike
Heehee!
LikeLike
toilet paper – ABSOLUTELY. anyone who does it the other way is a……….fool (although I’d never say it). (andy rooney’s voice was speaking this post in my mind.) oh, and – waiting for style opinions with bated breath.
LikeLike
It seems everyone agrees with me. So why do I see it hanging wrong everywhere?
LikeLike
But wait! TP over the top is just exactly right for a not-quite-two-year-old to feed into the toilet until the roll is empty. (Ask me how I know this)
LikeLike
You are absolutely right (correct). I recently had a guest who is obsessive regarding the TP, since I love her I made certain it was installed incorrectly just to see if she would notice and say something. I did this only in the guest bath and downstairs bath, I changed it every morning if she had corrected the roll. She never said anything, I have to wonder if it made her slightly crazed.
LikeLike
Ha! I hope you made her a little crazed! One of my husband’s relatives used to move a small table I have in my powder room. Changing toilet paper is bad enough – rearranging the furniture???
LikeLike
Now my uncle, an old, stubborn, left handed German, puts his toilet paper “backwards” on the roll (and it is on the left side of his toilet). One day while visiting his house I “fixed” it for him and got a talking to about why old, stubborn, left handed Germans need the toilet paper rolls to be upside down. Huh… It made me rethink my whole relationship with toilet paper.
LikeLike